Squarely arsed readers...
... how good are the promos for Big Brother? I can't get that "I Don't Think So" song out of my head -- not that I'd want to, since it always gives me a little frisson of excitement over the upcoming series. My god. What's happening to me? I'm actually excited about the start of Big Brother for the first time since, like, 2004. The particular ad featuring John Howard giving a radio interview, saying 'get this stupid program off the air' hits exactly the note that the BB producers should be aiming for. I'm naturally sceptical of the planned panel show element of the 2008 series, as it had proved horrendously bad television in the past, but with the promise of an Uncut revival I'm happy to go along with it. Well done, Ten. For once I'm optimistic about your programming schedule.
Continuing my unseemly positive tone, I just would like to say that Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares makes for pretty good viewing. I normally despise cooking shows, which is what I thought this show essentially is, but I found that it was more in the vein of Trinny and Susannah than Jamie Oliver. Except, obviously, for poorly managed restaurants instead of fashion.
Last Thursday's episode featured some former theatre actor who decided to pour all his life savings into a posh restaurant specialising in seafood, situated just several hundred feet from the shore at Brighton. It should be added here that the restaurateur hadn't actually tasted seafood in thirty years, and that the produce his chefs were cooking wasn't actually taken from anywhere near the coast at Brighton. In comes Gordon Ramsay like a tornado of fucks and shits and other delightful words, giving him and his lazy staff a right bollocking. Of the two chefs, an Australian and a Frenchman, neither is sure which is meant to be the Head Chef. Nor do either of them have much of a clue how to cook, and at one point we have Gordon Ramsay throwing away hundreds of dollars worth of crayfish because it had been cooked all wrong.
The attitudes of the staff are pretty funny. They take advantage of the poor restaurant manager, who doesn't seem to realise that everything about his venture is sloppy and pretentious. Like, for example, the decor, which features pieces from a little known local artist. The main centrepiece is a splotchy piece of crap that probably wouldn't have gone up on the fridge if I had brought it home from kindy back in the day, complete with a pair of women's knickers encrusted into the paint. Women's knickers. Encrusted into the paint. You really do feel for the guy, though, in spite of the horrendous decor. Gordon takes him aside to discuss how much money he's losing from the restaurant, and in the torrent of tears that follows I couldn't help but get a bit weepy myself.
Anyway, I shan't be going into it more than that, but I was gently surprised by the show. Shamefully, the only thing I'd heard about it was from this post by Chesty. Oh, and the kerfuffle that arose when some Liberal arsehat wanted it banned because of Gordon's swearing, as if makes any sense at all to watch an entire television show despite not liking it very much and then proceed to use it as political leverage. Um, get a life, pls kthxbai.
Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares airs on Channel Nine at 8.30pm on Thursday nights.
Continuing my unseemly positive tone, I just would like to say that Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares makes for pretty good viewing. I normally despise cooking shows, which is what I thought this show essentially is, but I found that it was more in the vein of Trinny and Susannah than Jamie Oliver. Except, obviously, for poorly managed restaurants instead of fashion.
Last Thursday's episode featured some former theatre actor who decided to pour all his life savings into a posh restaurant specialising in seafood, situated just several hundred feet from the shore at Brighton. It should be added here that the restaurateur hadn't actually tasted seafood in thirty years, and that the produce his chefs were cooking wasn't actually taken from anywhere near the coast at Brighton. In comes Gordon Ramsay like a tornado of fucks and shits and other delightful words, giving him and his lazy staff a right bollocking. Of the two chefs, an Australian and a Frenchman, neither is sure which is meant to be the Head Chef. Nor do either of them have much of a clue how to cook, and at one point we have Gordon Ramsay throwing away hundreds of dollars worth of crayfish because it had been cooked all wrong.
The attitudes of the staff are pretty funny. They take advantage of the poor restaurant manager, who doesn't seem to realise that everything about his venture is sloppy and pretentious. Like, for example, the decor, which features pieces from a little known local artist. The main centrepiece is a splotchy piece of crap that probably wouldn't have gone up on the fridge if I had brought it home from kindy back in the day, complete with a pair of women's knickers encrusted into the paint. Women's knickers. Encrusted into the paint. You really do feel for the guy, though, in spite of the horrendous decor. Gordon takes him aside to discuss how much money he's losing from the restaurant, and in the torrent of tears that follows I couldn't help but get a bit weepy myself.
Anyway, I shan't be going into it more than that, but I was gently surprised by the show. Shamefully, the only thing I'd heard about it was from this post by Chesty. Oh, and the kerfuffle that arose when some Liberal arsehat wanted it banned because of Gordon's swearing, as if makes any sense at all to watch an entire television show despite not liking it very much and then proceed to use it as political leverage. Um, get a life, pls kthxbai.
Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares airs on Channel Nine at 8.30pm on Thursday nights.
Labels: Big Brother, Cooking, Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares
posted by Jacob at
6:05 pm
4 Comments
The Cook and the Chef – ABC, 6:30pm, Wednesdays
If there are three words which define The Cook and the Chef, they are “nut-brown butter”. For crying out loud Maggie, isn’t it possible that you don’t always need your butter to be nut-freaking-brown? Every time butter is used, I hope that she will use some other adjective. But no. It’s nut-brown or nothing. Another friend claims that the utter lack of chemistry between Simon and Maggie is off-putting. I don't know. I kind of like the idea that they aren't pretending to like/respect/tolerate each other.
Iron Chef – SBS, 8:30pm Saturdays
Who doesn’t love Iron Chef*? The kitchen stadium, the ridiculous cravats, condescending commentators, the mindless consumption of raw capsicums. This show has it all!
My major beef with Iron Chef is that the theme ingredient is often incidental to the dish prepared. I wouldn’t argue, for example, that in a dish which features lobster, foie gras, saffron and the tears of a sentimental duck, the defining ingredient is zucchini.
The other thing that bugs me about this show are the celebrity guests. They seem to INSIST on having a woman on the panel, and then constantly ridicule her for her lack of knowledge about cooking. What is the point of that, other than to make me cross?
Ready, Steady Cook – Ten, 2:00pm weekdays
I like the idea of this show, though it is a complete rip off of Iron Chef. What a shame that the host has the kind of knowledge about cooking that David Reyne has about placebos. The chefs are good – but I do wonder why they bother with audience participation – it just seems to slow everything down.
Jamie at Home – Ten, 7:30pm, Fridays
One of my friends remarked recently that the great benefit of Jamie Oliver is that he has identified his niche. His niche appears to be people who can’t be bothered undertaking some kind of Homeric Odyssey to discover the oregano growing on the side of a forbidding cliff, picked by raven-haired virgins at midnight on a blue moon. His niche, therefore, is people like me, who are just pleased that their local supermarket actually stocks fresh kaffir lime leaves. Having said all of this, boy oh boy am I sick of Jamie Oliver.
Karen Martini on Better Homes and Gardens – Seven, 7:30pm Fridays
If only I could stand to wade through all the other home-renovations crap that is this show, I would quite like to see more of Karen Martini. She makes great food – and she has the ability to avoid talking-down to her audience without selling herself as some kind of skills-vortex.
And it doesn't stop there. You'll notice I haven't mentioned: Food Lovers Guide to Australia, Vasili's Kitchen, Huey's Cooking Adventures, Fresh, Surfing the Menu, Heart and Soul, the Hairy Bikers Ride Again, or the veritable pantheon currently available on pay-TV.
Or Two Fat Ladies, the Naked Chef, Cooking with Kurma, Yan Can Cook, Nigella Feasts, Delia Smith, Rick Stein's Fruits of the Sea, Surprise Chef, Nick Nairn, Captain Cook, or the BBC's amusing sit-com starring Lenny Henry, Chef!
Okay, so at the end of the day I’d rather be at Jacques Reymond, but in the meantime I’m happy to keep watching cooking shows. Who knows, one day I might even cook something.
* Mr Fix.
Also - you have no idea how difficult it was not to label this post "nut brown butter".