Robin Hood

So “inspired” by my mother in law, which is another way of saying,

“Abandoned by my mother in law who raced to the television like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory had come true and you really could pick up a block of chocolate from the screen”

And in the absence of anything else interesting to do, I decided to watch Robin Hood. Honestly, the teeve options aren’t exactly setting my world on fire on a Sunday night and there isn’t even any learning to be done anymore. Plus my MiL’s house only has one television so it wasn’t like I could sneak off and watch So You Think You Can Dance, even if I wanted to.

Anyway, so back to Robin Hood. Being an argumentative sort, I started a stupid argument with my MiL’s partner over whether or not they would end the story with historical accuracy (namely that Robin Hood bleeds to death after being betrayed by a nun). Of course MilP thinks that Robin Hood and Maid Marian run off and have ten children while tra-la-la-ing around the forest and making floral tiaras in their spare time. Yeah sure, and Prince John is a Mountain Lion, and best friends with a snake.

One of the things that bothers me about it is the "futuristic medieval" genre. My sister and I have had a running stoush with one of her friends about the term "futuristic medieval", which was applied in the original melee to the Star Wars movies. Of course, it isn't possible for Star Wars to be "futuristic medieval", as medieval necessarily applies to the middle ages, where Star Wars is ancient history. Robin Hood, on the other hand, is set in medieval times and is frankly borrowing heavily from the 21st century cultural experience, leading it to be a more accurate incarnation of the term, "futuristic medieval". Of course, if I use that term ever again I'm going to have to blind myself with a laser pointer. Or, you know, an arrow. Whatevs.

So I’ve watched three episodes now, which I think is enough to have formed an opinion. Although it’s possible I did miss large chunks of it when I watched it in the privacy of my own home, busy as I was sputtering about the “Merry Men as Melting Pot” motif and making myself cups of tea.

Things I like about it:

1. Occasional piece of fashion excellence in Maid Marian’s wardrobe
2. Web site includes listing of each character’s weaponry. I would not be surprised to learn that they had some kind of WoW dude design it*
3. Allan-a-dale and Will Scarlett. Actually, to be totally honest I can’t figure out if I like them so much as tolerate them
4. It’s not often you see blokes with (literal) feathers in their hats on television these days


Things I despise about it:

1. Robin’s hair (facial and otherwise)**
2. Sheriff is not “so evil he’s funny – he’s hilarious, he’s so great, can you ever imagine seeing him in anything else I wouldn’t be able to take him seriously I’d always think he’s the sheriff tee hee hee”
3. Cutaways between scenes remind me a little bit too much of ‘It’s a Knockout’
4. Robin’s inability to pick up his clothes (is it necessary to discard a cape in the street in EVERY SINGLE EPISODE?)
5. Can’t hear soundtrack without wishing I was watching Pirates of the Caribbean (but only the first one)
6. Breaks in action at completely inexplicable times: if you’re searching the forest for the Sheriff of Nottingham, without whom the town of Nottingham will be razed to the ground, you’d take the time to ruminate on your impending (but oh-so-secret) nuptials with your chums?
7. ‘Dude, WTF’ moments so frequent as to induce whiplash
8. 21st century social/cultural updates simultaneously necessary/nauseating

No doubt other people like this show*** (although it’s distinctly possible none of them read this blog). I can suspend my disbelief. But I just don’t care enough about any of these characters to bother.


Robin Hood screens on what we now know as ABC 1, at 7:30pm on Sundays


* I am now pretty much guaranteed to bear the wrath not only of Robin Hood fans, but also WoW fans.

** Keep yourselves nice, you know what I mean.

*** Actonb's girls, for example.