SYTYCDA: Sydney - the Angst capital of Australia
Sydney - that world-renowned city of sultry sparkliness.
A sparkliness that's just not happening for poor Miss Nat - she look so unsure of herself, standing there in the bright and harsh sunlight at Carriageworks. It's something about her mouth and the way she's concentrating so damn hard that she's squinting at the autocue. That could be the sun too though I guess - but it's doing nothing good for her.
Our first hamster, (or should that be dancing mouse?) is Hilton. He's so ultra-confident of his abilities that he totally reckons he'll be the winner. This is good - arrogance is good but then Oh No! The Angst, the Sob Story, the Journey... The angle this time is that his parents gave up their careers to clean the the dance studio in return for the his lessons. Gah! But when you hear how many lessons he's had, then yeah, it probably would end up evening out in the end - ballet, jazz, tap, bloody everything. He is very good. Very very good. Hip hop + Contemp + a little dash of ballet thrown into the mix. And he dances with his shoes off, then on, then off again - see Lamb? That's how you do the shoe thing gracefully!
The judges go wild and he gets to... stay in Sydney! Yay! Talk about a anti-climax...
read the rest
His girlfriend Jess is up next. The judges think she's holding back, is intimidated by Hilton, is letting the nerves get to her, so she gets to go to choreo...
Now Vanessa (Souffle???? Is that seriously her surname or did I just imagine that?) calls herself a pilates instructor. And she has very good... core muscles. And lots of strength. But a really annoying breathless squeaky voice. Luckily Jason can see past the voice to drool and sigh all over her, which was just the teeniest bit icky. She gets to stay in Sydney as well.
Question: If they're all 'staying' in Sydney, why do they get tickets? Is that a Cityrail pass to Redfern? Coz I don't think it'll fit in the turnstiles...
Cue montage of awesome sydney dancers... Thankfully most of them seem to be contemp - which means less hip hop, which is always a Good Thing. But it would be nice to see more dance styles in there as well.
But maybe not the pussycat doll, pole-dancing, gender-bending style that Albert brings... the bali-born dancer had my daughters utterly confused. Utterly. And totally. 'But, but, Mum...' they said 'He's wearing girl's boots. And jeans. And, and...' Yeah.
More contemporary - with super-extra-tortured facial expressions. Sarah is gorgeous to watch, angst-ridden though the dance is, and you just know she's got a sob story up her sleeve. She does. And it's a biggie. She's an anorexia survivor - has a healthy weight of 55-60kg and yet at her worst was down at 28kg. But she is amazingly strong. And not so much with the blame, just straight-forward and down-to-earth. She gets to stay in Sydney, and for once I'm thinking the producers actually handled something elegantly.
Stephanie & Henry are jiving next up, and while it's a good dance, and the partnership is strong, Steph is kinda bugging me with the Lacey-like mugging to the audience/judges. I guess they agree with me, because Henry gets a pass through to the Top 100 (or 154 or whatever it's at now) but Stephanie has to go to choreo. Which really really pisses her off. Hee! And then she pulls major bitch-faces at camera and it's even funnier!
More bitchface comes courtesy of Will - Mr Gay Australia - who hope everyone else will be awful in auditions, including all his friends... Nice.
He dances a cunning mixture of hip hop and contemporary in a bid to piss me off entirely... and then has a rant about men dancing like men, which is rewarded by a smirk from Jason. He gets sent through to choreo, but we all know he'll get through - the judges seem unable to count.
Next up is Daniell, who's missing her 'e' poor girl. Whatever she was dancing to, Matt was singing along which is cute, but he'd better not let Jason see him doing that! It also proves that he is, in fact, 12. Still, a cute 12.
It's another contemp routine, but Jason isn't impressed - he doesn't even want her going to choreo - so it's up to Matt and Bonnie to make the call. The poor girl virtually prostrates herself, begging, pleading, grovelling to be able to go through to the next round. It's sad and pitiful, but works on them both, as they're both Big Softies. It's official.
Not a Big Softie however is another Matt. He's doing ballroom with his partner Delia, but though considerably stronger than her, proceeds to preempt the judges decisions, insisting that he shouldn't be penalised for his partner not being up to standard. While she's standing right next to him. All the judges slam him for his unchivalrous behvaiour, but still send him through to choreo. He then continues to justify his position, oblivious to the gutted girl standing beside him. His partner of the last six years. Australia: If he gets through, please let us dump his sorry arrogant arse at the earliest opportunity.
A couple of random observations at this point:
Bonnie has swapped her purple leather jacket for a lime green version. It's pukeful. I pity the poor cow that gave it's life to make it.
Thankfully Nat looks kinda cute in buttercup yellow.
Cassie is a beautiful canvas apparently according to Jason - but hersob story routine isn't enough to move him - she heads off to choreo hell bent on her mission 'to move, to touch, Jason'.
Choreo round - and if I never hear that tract again, I'll die a happy little recapper. It's 'Please don't stop the Music' by the way - please, please don't ever subject me to it again.
Australia goes, 'hmmm, interesting' as the only girl who nails the choroe is Daniell of the mssing E. Australia groans as Matt-the-Prat goes through. Australia also groans as another girl, Whitney, implodes spectacularly when she fails the audition. This time Jason goes running to the loos after her, to make sure she's OK, and to offer her the chance to come back the next day to try out again. Australia then collectively cries, um, excuse me? WTF?
Day 2 is the day of the unending hip hop.
It starts off with Sione and Josh doing some Kiwi Krumping. Josh does most of the work, Sione just stands there like a big man prop. A manly man prop though - never forget that. No unseemly boy-on-boy dancing around here... Nooooo.....
And then moves along to a montage of various b-boys and girls. And by montage I mean, no-one is clearly identifiable so seriously I have no idea what proportion were boys or girls - they were pretty much all upside down anyways.
Then there's a couple of stand-outs - including Olivier (or 'Oli' to his friends) who's a B-Boy, a Popper AND a stockbroker. You go boyfriend! He kinda wanders onto the stage, walking about looking at his watch, till he gets yelled at by Jason, then he breaks into a pretty good display. It's impressive enough to get him through to the next round.
BJ reckons he's been sick, so sick and that he won't do justice to the audition. He does look kinda grey... but he does lots of pirouettes and whatnot - Matt calls him a great turner - but not much in between, like dancey stuff... He does the whole, 'yeah but I bin sick, miss' thing, and gets sent through to choreo. I'm happy to write him off as a slacker, but the ambos hanging around in the background give me the impression that maybe he really has been sick... I'm inclined to reserve judgement here.
And proving just how sultry Sydney really is, they wheel in a pole for some Pole Dancing... it's all very, er, athletic... and the girls do have some very pretty knickers... and lovely shoes. Poor Bonnie comes over all modest, prompting a merciless teasing from Matt... and poor Jason! Well, it's enough to bring out closet hetrosexual in him, poor lamb!
A couple of the pole dancers even show off enough versatility and flexibility (in dance, peoples) to get through to the next round. Yay to Sydney for finally showing us something different!
Something NOT completely is Graeme and his contemp routine to a Missy Higgins track. It was good and yay for him - he gets to stay in Sydney. His teacher Michael, supposedly some hip Sydney choreographer, has chosen NOT to choreo his audition routine - and then comes all unstuck and wanders off the stage mid-twirl. It kinda flummoxes the judges who reckon 'it wasn't as bad as you think it was' and then proceed to give him a Sydney City return... out of pity? I dunno...
And then oooh! more intrigue, more drama... because who's turned up to audition again - our dear stroppy friend Nikki... she bounces on to the stage wearing a little lacey dress and a big smile and then does a bizarre narrative contemp thing. The judges must have seen some light or some shade or some something in there because she get sent to choreo again...
After Matt's choreo, and thankfully the last time we have to watch/listen to it, BJ the turner, Oli the stockbroker, the kiwi krumpers (BOTH of them), and the two failed auditionees, Nikki and Whitney, all get to stay in Sydney.
Hmm... firstly, I think the producers can't count.
Secondly, I think the tickets were being given away in Sydney like we had some funky single ticketing system...
But, at least next week we get to see our Top However many, and then this competition will really start to kick along.
Can we get a yay?
A sparkliness that's just not happening for poor Miss Nat - she look so unsure of herself, standing there in the bright and harsh sunlight at Carriageworks. It's something about her mouth and the way she's concentrating so damn hard that she's squinting at the autocue. That could be the sun too though I guess - but it's doing nothing good for her.
Our first hamster, (or should that be dancing mouse?) is Hilton. He's so ultra-confident of his abilities that he totally reckons he'll be the winner. This is good - arrogance is good but then Oh No! The Angst, the Sob Story, the Journey... The angle this time is that his parents gave up their careers to clean the the dance studio in return for the his lessons. Gah! But when you hear how many lessons he's had, then yeah, it probably would end up evening out in the end - ballet, jazz, tap, bloody everything. He is very good. Very very good. Hip hop + Contemp + a little dash of ballet thrown into the mix. And he dances with his shoes off, then on, then off again - see Lamb? That's how you do the shoe thing gracefully!
The judges go wild and he gets to... stay in Sydney! Yay! Talk about a anti-climax...
read the rest
His girlfriend Jess is up next. The judges think she's holding back, is intimidated by Hilton, is letting the nerves get to her, so she gets to go to choreo...
Now Vanessa (Souffle???? Is that seriously her surname or did I just imagine that?) calls herself a pilates instructor. And she has very good... core muscles. And lots of strength. But a really annoying breathless squeaky voice. Luckily Jason can see past the voice to drool and sigh all over her, which was just the teeniest bit icky. She gets to stay in Sydney as well.
Question: If they're all 'staying' in Sydney, why do they get tickets? Is that a Cityrail pass to Redfern? Coz I don't think it'll fit in the turnstiles...
Cue montage of awesome sydney dancers... Thankfully most of them seem to be contemp - which means less hip hop, which is always a Good Thing. But it would be nice to see more dance styles in there as well.
But maybe not the pussycat doll, pole-dancing, gender-bending style that Albert brings... the bali-born dancer had my daughters utterly confused. Utterly. And totally. 'But, but, Mum...' they said 'He's wearing girl's boots. And jeans. And, and...' Yeah.
More contemporary - with super-extra-tortured facial expressions. Sarah is gorgeous to watch, angst-ridden though the dance is, and you just know she's got a sob story up her sleeve. She does. And it's a biggie. She's an anorexia survivor - has a healthy weight of 55-60kg and yet at her worst was down at 28kg. But she is amazingly strong. And not so much with the blame, just straight-forward and down-to-earth. She gets to stay in Sydney, and for once I'm thinking the producers actually handled something elegantly.
Stephanie & Henry are jiving next up, and while it's a good dance, and the partnership is strong, Steph is kinda bugging me with the Lacey-like mugging to the audience/judges. I guess they agree with me, because Henry gets a pass through to the Top 100 (or 154 or whatever it's at now) but Stephanie has to go to choreo. Which really really pisses her off. Hee! And then she pulls major bitch-faces at camera and it's even funnier!
More bitchface comes courtesy of Will - Mr Gay Australia - who hope everyone else will be awful in auditions, including all his friends... Nice.
He dances a cunning mixture of hip hop and contemporary in a bid to piss me off entirely... and then has a rant about men dancing like men, which is rewarded by a smirk from Jason. He gets sent through to choreo, but we all know he'll get through - the judges seem unable to count.
Next up is Daniell, who's missing her 'e' poor girl. Whatever she was dancing to, Matt was singing along which is cute, but he'd better not let Jason see him doing that! It also proves that he is, in fact, 12. Still, a cute 12.
It's another contemp routine, but Jason isn't impressed - he doesn't even want her going to choreo - so it's up to Matt and Bonnie to make the call. The poor girl virtually prostrates herself, begging, pleading, grovelling to be able to go through to the next round. It's sad and pitiful, but works on them both, as they're both Big Softies. It's official.
Not a Big Softie however is another Matt. He's doing ballroom with his partner Delia, but though considerably stronger than her, proceeds to preempt the judges decisions, insisting that he shouldn't be penalised for his partner not being up to standard. While she's standing right next to him. All the judges slam him for his unchivalrous behvaiour, but still send him through to choreo. He then continues to justify his position, oblivious to the gutted girl standing beside him. His partner of the last six years. Australia: If he gets through, please let us dump his sorry arrogant arse at the earliest opportunity.
A couple of random observations at this point:
Bonnie has swapped her purple leather jacket for a lime green version. It's pukeful. I pity the poor cow that gave it's life to make it.
Thankfully Nat looks kinda cute in buttercup yellow.
Cassie is a beautiful canvas apparently according to Jason - but her
Choreo round - and if I never hear that tract again, I'll die a happy little recapper. It's 'Please don't stop the Music' by the way - please, please don't ever subject me to it again.
Australia goes, 'hmmm, interesting' as the only girl who nails the choroe is Daniell of the mssing E. Australia groans as Matt-the-Prat goes through. Australia also groans as another girl, Whitney, implodes spectacularly when she fails the audition. This time Jason goes running to the loos after her, to make sure she's OK, and to offer her the chance to come back the next day to try out again. Australia then collectively cries, um, excuse me? WTF?
Day 2 is the day of the unending hip hop.
It starts off with Sione and Josh doing some Kiwi Krumping. Josh does most of the work, Sione just stands there like a big man prop. A manly man prop though - never forget that. No unseemly boy-on-boy dancing around here... Nooooo.....
And then moves along to a montage of various b-boys and girls. And by montage I mean, no-one is clearly identifiable so seriously I have no idea what proportion were boys or girls - they were pretty much all upside down anyways.
Then there's a couple of stand-outs - including Olivier (or 'Oli' to his friends) who's a B-Boy, a Popper AND a stockbroker. You go boyfriend! He kinda wanders onto the stage, walking about looking at his watch, till he gets yelled at by Jason, then he breaks into a pretty good display. It's impressive enough to get him through to the next round.
BJ reckons he's been sick, so sick and that he won't do justice to the audition. He does look kinda grey... but he does lots of pirouettes and whatnot - Matt calls him a great turner - but not much in between, like dancey stuff... He does the whole, 'yeah but I bin sick, miss' thing, and gets sent through to choreo. I'm happy to write him off as a slacker, but the ambos hanging around in the background give me the impression that maybe he really has been sick... I'm inclined to reserve judgement here.
And proving just how sultry Sydney really is, they wheel in a pole for some Pole Dancing... it's all very, er, athletic... and the girls do have some very pretty knickers... and lovely shoes. Poor Bonnie comes over all modest, prompting a merciless teasing from Matt... and poor Jason! Well, it's enough to bring out closet hetrosexual in him, poor lamb!
A couple of the pole dancers even show off enough versatility and flexibility (in dance, peoples) to get through to the next round. Yay to Sydney for finally showing us something different!
Something NOT completely is Graeme and his contemp routine to a Missy Higgins track. It was good and yay for him - he gets to stay in Sydney. His teacher Michael, supposedly some hip Sydney choreographer, has chosen NOT to choreo his audition routine - and then comes all unstuck and wanders off the stage mid-twirl. It kinda flummoxes the judges who reckon 'it wasn't as bad as you think it was' and then proceed to give him a Sydney City return... out of pity? I dunno...
And then oooh! more intrigue, more drama... because who's turned up to audition again - our dear stroppy friend Nikki... she bounces on to the stage wearing a little lacey dress and a big smile and then does a bizarre narrative contemp thing. The judges must have seen some light or some shade or some something in there because she get sent to choreo again...
After Matt's choreo, and thankfully the last time we have to watch/listen to it, BJ the turner, Oli the stockbroker, the kiwi krumpers (BOTH of them), and the two failed auditionees, Nikki and Whitney, all get to stay in Sydney.
Hmm... firstly, I think the producers can't count.
Secondly, I think the tickets were being given away in Sydney like we had some funky single ticketing system...
But, at least next week we get to see our Top However many, and then this competition will really start to kick along.
Can we get a yay?
Labels: SYTYCD
posted by actonb at
4:05 pm
9 Comments:
OK this is the first ep of SYTYCD I have been able to watch and I need this question answered!
Has Natalie had some sort of facelift/botox/something... Her face just looks.. weird. I didn't think she used to look like that?!
Natalie looks better with straight hair I think.
The dude who showed up with the boots and danced the slutty version of a Christina song (I think it was Xtina, anyway) was SUCH an embarrassment, to me and the entire country. God.
Oh, and YAY!
... and he couldn't keep time either Jacob!
Natalie looks better when she's doing the empathy thing with the contestants. When she's been done over for a to-camera (or whatever the technical term is) then she looks, as anonymous pointed out, kinda... odd.
And her mouth doesn't work properly. It's like the words are having to make a break for it out of the corners of her mouth...
I'm reserving judgement on Nat. Sometimes she does ok ... other times she blows chunks. But I really want her to get a better bra or higher-cut tops or - something. Those puppies are not looking their best lately.
I thought Sarah was awesome. She made me completely forget her heinous song choice and I actually shed a tear for her dancing and I respected that she didn't walk out on stage and go 'hi, I'm sarah, I had anorixia but I'm ok now. In fact, I'm a survivor. I've fought so hard to be here and now that you're all in tears, I will do a mediocre dance and you will put me through because it would be cruel not to.'
So yay for her!
Less yay for Matt for being an arse to his partner.
And ... a bit less yay for Judge Matt for putting the call on that whingy begging chick onto Bonnie. She didn't look too happy about it either - I would have been pissed.
And ... Oh my. Will. I loved when Bonnie said there was a great dancer in there trying to get out ... from beneath the fug and the arrogance and the horrible hair and the male-stripper choreography and ... the fug.
He used to be such a sweet boy. Sigh.
The fug was pretty intense.
Actually, it was more than just 'pretty' intense...
snerk.
Seriously. Did anyone keep a running count of how many tickets they gave out?
And I am reserving judgement on Natalie. She seems sort of ...wooden.
Interesting to know.
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